Issue 50 - Control

Welcome to Issue 50 of Deep Life Reflections, where I share five things I’ve been enjoying and thinking about over the past week.

In this week’s Friday Five, we join author Ryan Holiday as he champions the virtue of self-control in his book, Ego is the Enemy, explore the complex character of Enzo Ferrari as portrayed in Michael Mann’s latest film, Ferrari, and contemplate the balance of maintaining our humility while pursuing our ambitions.

Join me as we explore this week’s Friday Five.

1. What I’m Reading

Ego is the Enemy. By Ryan Holiday.

“To whatever you aspire, ego is your enemy.”

We are often told that to achieve success, we need confidence. Ego is the Enemy: The Fight to Master Our Greatest Opponent counters the conventional notion that confidence is key. Ryan Holiday breaks down the nuanced relationship between ego and success, advocating for self-control over self-importance.  

Structured in three parts—Aspiration, Success, and Failure—the book argues ego is ever-present at all three stages and isn’t a one-time challenge. Through easy-to-read chapters filled with stories and lessons from history, Holiday shows how true accomplishment often comes from humility rather than arrogance. He provides the example of William Sherman, one of America’s greatest generals, whose leadership didn’t come from self-declared greatness but from actual achievements and a focus on action over validation and status.

Holiday shares many examples like Sherman. He points out that while history and business books are crammed with tales of relentless, visionary individuals reshaping the world through sheer will, history is also made by people who quietly overcame their own egos, avoided the limelight, and put their higher goals above their desire for personal recognition.

The book’s central argument is that ego obstructs our view. We are all susceptible to applying gratifying labels to ourselves, such as “I am an entrepreneur because I struck out on my own.” That’s pride and ego at work. When we feel both, Holiday encourages us to ask, “What am I missing right now that a more humble person might see?” It prompts us to challenge our perceptions of success and self-worth. By understanding ourselves and broadening our perspective, we gain the upper hand over ego and gain more insight.

It’s admirable to want to be better and want to do great things. But humility and selflessness are as commendable as ambition, and no less impressive an accomplishment. The battle against ego is ongoing, like sweeping a floor. Just because we’ve done it once doesn’t mean the floor is clean forever. Every day, the dust of pride and vanity comes back.

Every day we must sweep.

2. What I’m Watching

Ferrari. Directed by Michael Mann.

Michael Mann is one of my favourite film directors. Ferrari is Mann’s latest picture, a complex portrait of Enzo Ferrari, the ex-racer turned entrepreneur whose name is synonymous with desire, speed, and the quest for perfection. Set in the summer of 1957, the film focuses on Ferrari’s personal crises: the grief over his son’s death, his faltering auto empire, and his fractured relationships, including one with his mistress with whom he has a child.

Adam Driver is excellent as Ferrari, balancing the complexity of a man who is both coldly driven by the pursuit of perfection and vulnerably human. Penélope Cruz, as his wife and business partner, Laura, is equally excellent, layered in a fog of grief over the death of their son, Dino, the year before.  

Mann’s depiction of Ferrari is of a ruthless genius, an Italian hero. Yet, Driver plays Ferrari as a man who is never satisfied, who seems aware that he is only one turn from disaster. This gives the film a strong sense of humanity, a trait Mann is renowned for in his films. There is a sense something isn’t quite right in Ferrari’s character, that he’s a loose wire away from disaster. Ferrari is like a human version of one of his high-speed super cars, just hoping not to crash.

The racing scenes in Ferrari are choreographed masterfully. Watching in the cinema, the noise was ferocious and much of the cinematography puts us behind the wheel of the car; we feel the danger and sense the dread during every race scene. These were the days when safety amounted to little more than a pair of goggles and a basic helmet. The spectre of death haunts the racing scenes. The film climaxes with the famous Mille Miglia, a 1,000-mile race across Italy. The 1957 version went down in history because of an appalling tragedy. Everyone in the cinema gasped at the scene—one of the most harrowing I’ve seen on screen.

What we’re left with is a man who embodied multiple competing roles—hero, visionary, scapegoat. The film examines how Ferrari’s ego not only obstructs but also uniquely shapes his worldview, driving his relentless pursuit amidst the intoxicating seduction and danger of racing. It’s a fascinating character study on ego’s dual role in Ferrari’s life. As film critic Alonso Duralde says, “Mann appreciates beauty and power while never forgetting that beauty can wither and power can destroy.”

3. What I’m Contemplating

Next week, I’m giving a talk to around 100 students of the Alpha Lambda Delta Honor Society at the American University in Dubai (AUD). I’m really looking forward to the talk, which will be my first public speaking event since my heart surgery. The university has tasked me with giving an inspirational talk focused on strategies for personal and professional growth, emphasising the pursuit of excellence and the importance of resiliency and adaptability.

My talk, called ‘Ten Timeless Lessons for a Life Well-Lived’ aims not to preach, but to offer insights and ideas—much like those in Ryan Holiday’s Ego is the Enemy. Considering this week’s theme about ego and humility, I’ve been careful in preparing my talk not to position these ten lessons as gospel, nor that I claim to have mastered any of them, or indeed that I consider my life the perfect example. Far from it. Instead, I’ll be sharing stories—from the great minds of history, the unsung heroes, and some of my own experiences—that hopefully can stimulate thought and generate conversations.

I’m also looking forward to hearing from the students, as the lessons that resonate most often come from a place of shared experience, and I expect to learn as much from them as they might from me.

4. A Quote to note

“Your ego can become an obstacle to your work. If you start believing in your greatness, it is the death of your creativity.”

- Marina Abramovic, performance artist

5. A Question for you

How can you recognise the difference between healthy self-esteem and detrimental ego in your daily life, and make adjustments accordingly?

Thanks for reading and being part of the Deep Life Journey community. Have a great weekend.

James

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