Deep Life Reflections: Friday Five
Issue 89 - 49
Welcome to a special edition of Deep Life Reflections. Today happens to be my 49th birthday. In the spirit of reflection, what better way to mark nearly half a century than by sharing 49 brief observations, lessons, and truths I’ve collected from five decades of life.
Enjoy this week’s Friday Five—and thank you for being part of the journey.
Let’s get going.
Life & Living 🌍
There are no shortcuts. At least, not to anywhere worthwhile.
To think critically, you must risk being offensive.
Worry less about legacy. Our efforts are not meant to last forever.
Much of life comes down to these three things: health, wealth, and relationships. Invest in them daily.
We don’t need false prophets or dogmas: real awe is all around us every day. We still know so little about life beneath the oceans or the depths of space.
I still can’t say the word ‘compartmentalise’. I’ve learned how to live with it. I think.
History is not black and white. Silence is not complicity. The world is nuanced and complex. Learn about it with an open mind.
Forgive yourself, forgive others. Forgiveness is one of our most powerful virtues.
Florence is the most impressive city on earth.
How we spend our days is how we spend our lives. (Confession: I stole this one from author Annie Dillard.)
Relationships & Connection ❤️
Never finish people’s sentences. They won’t feel heard and often we get it wrong.
Social media = unsocial media.
Meet people where they are, but don’t leave them there. (This is my coaching philosophy.)
Most human beings are not violent or cruel.
We are all judgmental by nature. To judge is human. Just let your opinions and judgement fade into the background when you are listening to someone.
The Apollo Space Missions was humanity at its soaring best.
When someone is frustrating or angering us, it’s because they’re not behaving as we want them to. Let that sink in.
Listening to someone with a different perspective doesn’t mean giving up your position on something important to you.
People who do not have children do not live with a void in their lives—they can fashion big, meaningful lives and take opportunities that may not be open to parents.
Growth & Mindset 🌱
Clarity is power.
We all have blind spots and we don’t change well on our own. This is where coaches can help.
Learn how you work. Find your natural pace. Stick to it.
Build rare and valuable skills that people will pay you for.
Stephen King doesn’t get the credit he deserves.
Your greatest room for growth lies where you are already strong, not your weaknesses or ‘areas of opportunity.’ Talk about this in your next end-of-year performance review.
Progress is what matters, not perfection.
To not make a decision is to make a decision. Salute to the procrastinators out there🫡 (That’s everyone by the way).
Our perspective shapes our experience in life, not our circumstances. It takes a lot of practice though.
Growth mindset over fixed mindset every time—but we have both. Know when to recognise each.
Wisdom & Perspective🦉
It’s not how long you live, it’s how well you live.
The most important lesson we ever learn at school is that the most important things cannot be learned at school—although we can make a start.
Our job is not our identity. Repeat that one.
The Usual Suspects has the greatest ending in cinematic history. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled and all that.
Financial wellbeing is as important as physical and mental wellbeing. We have room for significant improvement in all.
The words and language we use are important. “I am” are the two most powerful words in the English language because what you put after them defines you.
Our sense of humour is critical to surviving life. It gets us through a lot of tough spots. Thank you Larry David. Please don’t ever die.
Don’t aim for happiness—it’s fleeting and we can’t control it. Instead, aim for fulfilment. We’ve got a better shot there.
The answer to life is 42. The problem remains: what is the question? Ask the right questions.
Know what is enough and be happy with it. Very, very hard.
Everyday Living 🕰️
Three rules for living well: Have a routine; have a purpose; have a community of people you see regularly.
Do fewer things and do them better. Know why.
Not everyone is curious. But if you are, it helps.
Porridge is the breakfast of champions. At least in this household.
Make every effort to spend more time in nature. It lifts us.
Enjoy downtime and shed the guilt.
Fighting age is a losing battle. It’s going to happen anyway, so embrace every stage of life. You’ll never be younger than you are today.
Music is amazing. A single song can change an entire mood. Hello Gimme Shelter.
‘Hacks’ are for computer systems not human beings.
Reading books is essential to the nourishment of the soul. (And here you thought I was going to write a whole list without mentioning books or reading 😉)
Bonus: (because my OCD is struggling with 49)
Appreciate what you have. It will one day disappear. Its beauty lies in its impermanence.
Thanks for going the distance. Maybe some of these reflections resonated with you. As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts—feel free to leave a comment on my website or drop me a message. Have a great weekend ahead, and keep #39 in mind. And that last one.
James
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